How can someone have so little free time, her hours filled with commuting, working, eating, meeting, organizing, sleeping; yet feel so lonely, her thoughts before bed drifting to wishes and dreams and friendships that were or might be and her fears hinging on always eating alone, always planning alone, always wondering?
How can a life full of acquaintances equal a life with few friends? How can people she sees everyday seem like strangers and people she once knew have strange lives now, completely removed from her own?
Will she keep working—hourly, weekly, monthly—keep striving—to save, to give, to prepare—keep longing—for things her work and her savings, however faithful or strong, cannot give her?
Money can’t buy happiness, she knows, she knows. But she has to have money to pay for food and things, she has to work for the money, and so she has no time, so she is alone. And she’s tired. Tired and lonely and saving more and more money. And for what?
How can she be getting what she wants and not getting what she wants at all?
Networks
10 December 2007 at 12:26 am
Wow! After reading you post here, I couldn’t help but think . . . this girl knows exactly how I feel. There has been so many times in my life I have felt alone, especially when on the outside it seemed I had many friends and acquaintances. Essentially, I always wondered why. Why did it seem like everyone was operating on a different plane? Even today, I am still not sure. Furthermore, I also shared your sentiment on money and happiness. Although, I still believe that money cannot buy happiness, I often feel like that phrase ends with . . . just kidding!:) I know, I know . . . it doesn’t buy happiness, but I can’t help but think it makes things easier, especially because the rest of the world says it buys a big ol’ slab of happiness.
10 December 2007 at 10:37 am
Because she understands Biblical truths–that God hears her prayers and her heart’s cry for a more fulfilling life.
Because she knows that God is bringing those special people into her life… soon, soon.
Because she looks forward to a time when all of this planning will yield a fruitful life.
And because being a Proverbs 31 wife means knowing how to do all these things you’re learning how to do now.
10 December 2007 at 2:28 pm
Hang in there, this will pass and you’ll be fine.
10 December 2007 at 2:28 pm
Hang in there, this will pass and you’ll be fine.
10 December 2007 at 10:19 pm
it’s so sad that we’re taught money… and hard work… is everything in life. that’s not true. what’s everything is our friends and family. we should work so we can live, not vice versa.
if you feel lonely, make a serious effort to build up some friendships. meet someone… at a local community group or through craigslist. don’t try to make a billion friends at once, one or two would be enough. find other people with similar values who have just enough time to spend on building the friendship with you. then maybe you won’t be as lonely.